Kids, can't live with 'em, can't ship 'em to grandma's forever...

Managing Childhood Behavioral Concerns:

 

Families find themselves in therapy with their kids when nothing else has worked. They have tried to address behavior problems with all the typical tools of the trade; grounding, yelling, talking, even spanking. Despite all this, the family finds themselves walking on eggshells with their own child just trying to avoid the next blow up. Even fun events can turn into misery for everyone.

 

Parents have told me that what they really want is a concrete plan with measurable goals that they can  implement RIGHT NOW. They were under the impression that therapy would be a slow process with lots of talking and who has time for that? So yes, therapy does take time but my style is to put some band aids on the worst of the problems from day one and then sort out the the rest once the dust has settled. If you are looking for change sooner rather than later and are willing to hear me out, we can start to see a difference within weeks, not years.

 

We tend to parent the way we were parented, for better or worse. When there are two parents with different backgrounds it becomes even more confusing. Then add in the children you are trying to parent. One child in the family may blossom with one sort of parenting while another spirals out of control. In order to deal with such complex problems we need the whole family to be involved as much as humanly possible. You don’t need to sit up late at night feeling guilty for not enjoying the family you always dreamed of having. We will work together to create a simple, user friendly behavior plan to help everyone meet their goals.

 

We can only accomplish so much in one 45 minute session a week so it is important for parents to help facilitate positive change at home by following through with the agreed upon behavior plan. Once the behavior plan is in place and showing results I like to start spending more one on one time with your child and less time fine tuning the behavior plan. I will work with your child to learn ways to cope with their own frustration and learn to use flexible thinking and realistic optimism.

 

We may also use some fun “homework” assignments so that the learning continues outside of my office. Examples would be a journal (or E-journal), or drawing cartoons of tough situations during the week and learning to solve them with humor and imagination. Together we will learn to tame your child’s monster. In the end, we strive to create an environment that everyone can enjoy and be happy to come home to at the end of the day.

Of course, every child isn’t coming for therapy due to behavioral concerns. Some kids struggle with emotional problems that don’t lead to acting out. Unusual levels of fear and anxiety may result  in tears and issues with self esteem. Depression is also not unheard of in children, especially those kids that don’t quite fit in for one reason or other. Every child’s monster is unique, but with a little help your child can be happy again.

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